Single Parents Raising Happy Kids
The challenges of
a single parent are myriad. From single-handedly doing everything for your child, you also constantly face the dilemma of whether you are doing enough and if you are doing things right. In this, not being able to bring up a happy child could be a nightmare.
That’s where we come in, equipped with our tips to raise a happy kids. While we doff our hats to parents in general for the awesome job that you do, we are in awe of you incredible single parents, waddling this journey by yourself. You should know that you are awesome.
Happiness is at the core of everything that parents wish for their kids. Let’s get that right for you, awesome parent. Here are a list of pointers to ensure that you raise a happy, joyful child:
1.Keep yourself happy: This is at the core of raising your child happy. If you are not a happy, joyful soul, how will be your munchkin who spends most of his/her time around you be a happy one? Yes, it’s easier said than done but you need to find time alone to do things that bring you joy. Like reading a book, going out on your own for a cup of coffee, meeting friends, being a part of some social cause, learning a new art, anything that fills you up with utter happiness. How do you make this happen considering that there is no partner to fall back on, when you need time alone? You build beautiful relationships with neighbors, friends and extended family and you boldly “ask for help” when you need to.
The best way to teach your kids how to be happy is to show them what a happy person looks like. Set an example of self love and self care. Let them grow up watching their parent say nice things about her/his own self and investing in activities that bring joy and increase self worth.
2. Let your kids be unhappy sometimes: Yes you read that right. No one is happy all the time. It is perfectly alright to have bad days, even as kids. Learning to deal with boredom, sadness, angst etc is also an organic part of growing up. While you need to turn around your kids’ mood, you can show empathy and be there for them. They just need to know that you are there for them but that it’s okay to feel low sometimes. It is important to feel that emotion as well so that your kids appreciate happiness even more.
3. Time over material things: We all have our list of things we wish for and buy. Our kids do too and that’s okay. However, nothing beats the joy of spending quality time together. No video game is as much fun as playing a board game at home with your kids.
No TV show is as much fun as going out to grab an icecream or even watch a movie together. Kids love you for the time that you spend with them, even if it is to play a spell game. Teenagers probably wish for things more than your time but then give them your time anyway. They will eventually warm up to it.
4. Accept their quirks and unique weirdness:
Each of us are unique with our own idiosyncrasies and quirkiness. We really need to let our kids be and accept them for who they are. He doesn’t like to hug, no matter what you do? That’s okay. Your teenager isn’t sure whether she believes in God or not? That’s okay too. Your older son scoffs at materialism? Do not buy him expensive gifts. Gift him experiences. It’s absolutely okay for our kids to not be like us and blossom into their own quirky personalities, as long as they don’t hurt themselves or others. So let them be. That will bring everyone immense joy.
5. Gratitude: Teach them to be thankful for what they have. To truly understand what it means to be able to afford buying the things we don’t truly need. To be able to have four awesome meals in a day. Whatever we teach our kids or not, teaching them to be loving and full of gratitude is of utmost importance.
Start a “Thank you” jar routine at home or every night discuss the things about the day that you feel thankful for. Your kids will soon catch up.
6. Learn to say no: Your kids are going to hear a lot of “No” when they go out into the world. They need to learn to be okay with it and be happy anyone. Let the reality check begin at home. You don’t have to give into every whim and fancy.
Just say “no” respectfully and lovingly. Explain why if you need to be but be firm on your no to avoid emotional drama.
7. Let them be imperfect: Our kids were not born to be perfect little people leading incredibly perfect lives. Let them fall, make mistakes, flare up, goof up, do whatever it takes to become a well-rounded human being. Watch them from the sidelines, resist the temptation to fix everything for them, have their back but let them be. That will bring them utmost happiness in the long run.
Finally, remember to put your happiness first sometimes, if not always. Your kids need to see happy people around to grow up into joyful people. Remember, you are never alone. We at Wow Parenting are rooting for you, you awesome single parent.