The recognition gap conundrum
What is the recognition gap?’
Let us try and understand the same by considering a scenario:
Try asking a common question like ‘What do you like the most about the school?’ to:
a) Your children
b) School Teacher
c) School Principal
d) Yourself
Will you be able to guess the answers for the rest of them?
Will the answers all 4 of you give to be the same?
The simple answer is ‘No’.
This darling parent is the ‘recognition gap’.
Let’s take another example:
Ask your children ‘How would they rate you as a parent on the scale of 0 – 10’
Where 0 is the lowest and 10 is highest. While they are at it, rate yourself as parents on the scale of ‘0-10’.
Additionally, write reasons why have you rated yourself the way you have?
Similarly, ask your children to write reasons as well.
Compare your responses. You may find there is a difference. Even if you have a match on the scale of ‘0 -10’ there is definitely going to be a difference in your reasons.
This is another example of ‘Recognition Gap’.
What is the recognition gap?
The gap between what the child values and what the parent values is called as Recognition gap.
This similar gap can be found in the views of ‘What child believes it needs from life and what you as a parent believe the child needs from life. More the recognition gap the greater is the distance between a parent and a child.
How to bridge this recognition gap if you are a working parent?
We understand you go through heartbreaks and guilt if you happen to miss upon being there for your child’s swimming competition or when you are unable to pick them for their kathak classes.
But are these things important for your child? May be or maybe not.
The best way to bridge the recognition gap is to ask your child what is important for them? Ask them what would they love to do on the weekends?
Be transparent in your communication, share your limitations and always understand what’s important for your child. If we as working parents are able to do that, we are parenting our children beautifully well.
Keep watching our ‘Parenting for Working Parents’ series to learn more on how can working parents like you raise a champion child.