You are in a toy store where you spot a mother and a kid walking down past by your side. The kid throws a tantrum asking for a “fidget spinner”. The mom is helpless in stopping the kid’s tantrum and ends up buying him the fidget spinner. These kinds of scenarios are commonly seen in various places. Ever thought that we are trending towards a generation of raising spoiled children?
Love knows no limits, and parenting is one such form of unconditional love. But in the process of showering love on your little one, are you spoiling your child?
Fulfilling your kids’ demands at times is okay but, the excess of it goes on to become a habit which eventually gives rise to a disrespectful attitude. Read on to learn how to deal with a spoiled child.
What Is A Spoiled Brat?
If your kid is acting out, behaving immaturely, throwing tantrums then it can be termed as a “spoiled child syndrome”. These characteristics have somewhere stemmed out from the parents who have failed to impose age-appropriate manners.
So, how will you know if you are raising spoiled children? There are certain behavioral signs that tell you for e.g. your child refuses to take no for an answer. Parents usually in the face of frustration, exhaustion or pity surrender to their kid’s demands.
9 Symptoms of a Spoiled Kid:
- Temper tantrums
- Not self-starters/motivated
- Struggle to gel in the social circle or make friends
- Have a hard time being alone
- Sad and scared at times
- Poor academic performances
9 Warning Signs You’re Raising A Spoiled Child:
Your precious little one, at times, turns into a monster and you fail to recognize that. Is could be possible that you are overlooking their childish behavior?
Crucial signs of you raising spoiled children:
- You fulfill all their demands and requests easily
- Your kid often gives you empty threats
- You are there all the time to protect your child from difficult situations
- There is a need to bribe your kids to get things done
- You over-indulge them with gadgets, toys, and such materialistic items
- The kids get annoyed and angry when you try teaching them manners
- You let them disrespect or spit at you and your elders around you
- Gets too much involved in family matters
- Living vicariously through your child
Effects of Spoiling Children:
Understand that when you are often buying toys, gadgets, or goodies for your kids you are unknowingly spoiling your kid in the process. This overindulgence isn’t going to stop here if you don’t draw a line. Research suggests that spoiled children seem to be more dependent on their parents. They struggle to make their own decisions and rely on others for their happiness.
Often, these kids are unsure of how to feel good about themselves without getting praised from others which may have a bad impact on their childhood and also when they become adults.
The Possible Effects:
- They may become bullies or refuse to respect others. Why? Because; they have a hard time accepting that they are wrong.
- If they get away with anything and everything; they will have a hard time adjusting to the real world.
- The child might think it’s okay to do whatever they want to, in order to get the end result.
- He/she may take time to learn that bad behavior does get punished in some or the other ways.
- Your children won’t know how to take care of themselves hence; fail to become independent in adulthood.
- They may expect everything to fall in place for them and when things hit them hard they find it difficult to cope.
Tips On How To Correct Spoiled Children:
1. Discipline Your Children:
One of the most important things for parents to impose good manners and teach the child the importance of discipline. Children who are taught how to behave in a pleasant manner and practice patience can easily adapt to different social settings. They are good at making friends and will always set a great example of their upbringing.
2. Don’t Buy Your Kids Things To Mollify Their Bad Behavior:
Buying a candy bar or a toy to your screaming kid may make sense to settle him/her down. However; the shopping is nominal, as the results are quick. Your kid will calm down immediately. But; these quick fixes will have a negative impact in the long term. They teach the kids that by misbehaving their wishes and demands will be fulfilled.
3. Never Do False Praising:
It may be a good idea to give everyone a trophy just for participating in a game or race and labeling every child talented and outstanding. While the motivation for unwarranted praise to not feel bad about themselves is like attempting to foster their self-esteem. But rather you should make them understand the reality – not everyone can win or is equally talented in all things and that is okay.
4. Teaching Them The Value Of Money:
When your kids learn about how much the things cost, or how a household budget is maintained they are less likely to whine about something they want from the store. Teaching the value of money is important as those small-small incidents will build a solid foundation till they become adults and start managing on their own. They will be smart enough in handling their own allowances.
5. Ensure That They Do Their Own Chores:
Giving your kids age-appropriate tasks can not only help lighten some of your chores but; this will also prevail in a sense of responsibility among them. The earlier the better; surely, it may take a while to teach the basic chores. However, it will turn out to be an important foundation and be helpful for the rest of their lives.
6. Not Giving An Allowance Unless It Is Earned:
Educate your kids on how and when they will receive an allowance. Teach them about how the allowances are earned once their responsibility of suggested chore is completed. You can educate them on money management by giving basic and simple examples. This will develop a sense of entitlement perhaps a satisfactory reward of having it earned the hard way.
7. Explain Their Wrongdoings When You Both Are Calm:
A response when in anger will not teach a lesson, or improve your child instead it might get worse. Explaining them calmly about your side of why you had a reason to not to agree when they misbehaved or had disrespectful behavior explaining gently on how they can improve it.
8.Teach Your Child to be helpful:
Encourage your children to think beyond themselves by offering to volunteer together to clean up their surrounding mess, feed hungry families, and helping senior citizens. These small acts of kindness will teach your kids that there are people who are less fortunate and by helping them they can make differences in their lives.
Spoiling seems to be a way out to calm your tantrum throwing kid but by doing so we ourselves become an obstacle in their further development. We as parents are not here to stop their tantrums but to turn them into responsible adults of tomorrow.