How to deal with my anger…
* Use sanity anchors that help, like, “This too shall pass,” or “This is how my child is dealing with his own anxiety; I don’t need to get hooked into it.”
* Just take that minute to pause. It’s in that space that you have control.
* Breath deep a few times.
* Walk out for a few minutes.
* If you have plants at home, just touch the plants and come. It works like magic. Touching plants brings in tenderness. Tenderness conquers ego.
Here is a red flag. Be aware of the negative expectations that you might have of your child. I have realised, much of the time, these expectations are about my worry, fear and anxiety that I am projecting onto my child.
When I get angry, I am going to have judgments, and with judgment comes more anger. What I do, is to breathe in deep in those moments and just recognize my emotions behind my judgement. Sometimes it has been feelings of grief. Other times it has been sadness or frustration or even helplessness at something else. I visualise myself putting those feelings in a balloon and let them float away. Don’t get caught up in the judgments that go with negative feelings, because that will only make the reactivity stronger.