A ship without a rudder is a risk in calm waters and a disaster during a storm. Without effective communication, a family is reduced to nothing but a ship that does have a rudder.
Effective communication has been the building block of the parent-child relationship for decades.
Many a time, as parents you might not understand the importance of ‘now’ communication, in shaping the child’s future. More than often because of your busy schedule you might try to make up for time lost with large gifts.
We understand that you are working tirelessly to give your child the best future, and in this endeavour, somewhere family time gets compromised. While we know that attending phone calls and replying to those emails are important but that cannot be at the cost of missing out on the formative years of the child.
In a family gathering, do you see some kids completely aloof and disinterested? This might go back to the lack of communication with immediate family. Due to busy parents, kids tend to engulf themselves in a bubble of their own which then becomes hard to break.
So, what can you do avoid this? This article will help you understand just that. . .
Realise the thin line between talking and communication
From a tender age, kids need their parents’ attention. One way of attention is conversations. What is the difference between talking and conversations?
Talking is always one sided whereas communication is both ways. Let’s say, you believe the kids have done a mistake. Now, either you can have a conversation or you can TALK!
Asking them for their point of view without ‘prejudging’ them will lead to a conversation. In a conversation, both sides are attempting to understand, express and bridge the gap.
Criticizing or rebuking kids without listening to their point of view is talking. In talking, the person who is speaking wants to be understood without feeling any need to understand.
Not having a conversation with them will gradually teach them to keep their thoughts and feelings to themselves. This is quite dangerous because, after a point, your child will be too afraid to ask you for any help or assistance. The fear of punishment and rejection and being judged will be deeply instilled in them.
If you suddenly see your kids distancing themselves from you, sit and converse with them. Understanding what is going on in the mind. It will take all of you a few steps closer to each other.
Sit with your kids for quality time
Kids tend to develop complex at a very young age. This is especially so if they feel, they have no one to go to for advice or help. Be approachable even when they are wrong or have made some mistakes. Strict parenting without no communication can cause children to avoid the very parental wisdom they should be seeking.
While we understand you are really busy, do you sit with your children regularly? Start from today. Take interest in their life and be a WOW parent.
Help build self-esteem
We know you wish to build a sense of self-esteem in your kids. Self-esteem comes from a feeling of love and security in a healthy environment. While you wish to shower your kids with love, a few affectionate words WILL give him/her that extra push. You should praise your kids when they deserve it, but avoid overpraising. Help your child take healthy risks to build self-confidence.
Effective (logic) and empowering (emotions) communication between you and your kids will ensure that they have a healthy self-esteem.
Prioritize your little one
Sometimes, unknowingly you might make your kids feel that they are not a priority. When you are having a conversation with them, keep all your electronic devices away. Make eye contact as you listen to them and respond actively so that they know you care. A large part of communication is ‘listening’. Listen and understand their thoughts and feelings.
Making time for your children will make them feel you care and they will never shun away from sharing their thoughts with you.
Understand your kid’s psychology
As adults, sometimes we develop a mindset that makes it difficult for us to understand what a kid might be thinking. Sometimes you might have to step in the shoes of your child to understand them. What is small and insignificant to you, might mean the world to them. Think from their perspective and understand what they are feeling and why.
When with a child, become a child. That will help you understand them and get closer to them in no time.
Come back to communications
If you have given your children some advice on some problem, ask them what happened to post that. Take interest in your child’s life. When you follow up on a solution you had given earlier, they believe you also are genuinely interested in their life. This will make them come back to you time and again, building a strong bond, between you and your child.
Following up on your conversations will make them feel special
Building family traditions together
As the famous saying goes “the family that eats together, stays together”. Take out time from your busy schedule to create few rituals and traditions for your family. Family dinners, outings, or even a family vacation are a few practices that can bridge the communication gap. At least one meal a day can get the ball rolling.
Effective communication is the base of relationships and is an essential part of their learning and development. Listening and understanding can make all the difference.
While you are doing an excellent job in raising your little one, you can feel a stronger bond within a few moments of effective communication. We completely understand the time crunch in your busy schedule but a little more effort towards effective communication will make a huge difference to WOW Parenting.
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